Ask Lady Joan

Through our life times, we all want to at some point to fit in.  Also known as being accepted by our peers.  I use to think this was only a child hood feeling and once we matured and realized it was okay to be different and not fit in or be accepted it hits you again over and over in your life time or at least it has in my life time and recently it has crept in again.

When we are young it is usually with our peers at school and it makes us do things that we usually would not have done, but we know if we want to fit in and be accepted we have to do these things, or we get picked on by the group of people we want to be part of so badly. 

As we get older, we find others who are similar to us rather then change to fit in.  This search at times can take a while so we fake it with others and hide our true selves. 

As we mature, we come to a place in our life where we don`t care if others accept us.  But there are the exceptions to the rules as always, as it become those who are important in your life that you hope you can fit in and be accepted.  We also hopefully have learned how to communicate to these people we care about and fine important in our lives to express to them our differences and that they are mature enough to accept us. 

I have found in my life, that I have learned to accept people for who they are, although I may not always like what it is that makes them different, but I can accept their right to be different.  I find I hang out with people as well with similar point of view.  I can only hope with my knowledge and maturity that this newest feeling of Where do I fit in will not take long to resolve and become clear in my mind.

It’s the first day of the new year.  I wonder as some of you do, how did we get to 2010 so fast and how much has changed and yet how much has stayed the same.

My mother use to say, the older you get the faster time goes.  It’s true, I hate to admit.  I remember only yesterday it feels like that I was wishing my mom a Happy New Year, 2009.

Last year was both a great year for me and a very sad one. And with the bad, I have been able to move on with the good. I am glad time went fast as my heart is able to mend and come to terms of the  lost of my mom.  I am sad that it went fast as I want to savor my new relationship with the most wonderful person I met in 2009.

I look to the future, and only know that I will continue to live my life with the same passion I have been blessed with, both  good and bad that the universe will set before me, and learn from the life lessons and know I do not walk alone.

I wish everyone a happy New Year and hope they too enjoy what lays ahead of them.

I like to take this time to wish the best of the seasons to all my listeners, readers and fans.

This for me is a time to forgive those who I feel have slighted me, or hurt me and move on with my life letting go of negatives and reaching for positives.

I especially feel strongly about this, this year as it is the first year my mother is not with me in body, but I know she is in spirit as is my dad.

This does not mean I have to be friends with these people, just to allow myself to be free of the hurt and negative feelings I have for these people.

I wish the same this year for everyone, to be free of pent up negative feelings.

May we all get what we need plus a little extra.

Go to Fetlife and find the Santa, you can sit on his lap and get to pick  three gifts in the order you would like one.

Then the fun begins.

As well joining fetlife is a awesome place to learn and see all sorts of kinky stuff as well as stay in touch with friends and what is happening with the community in your area.

Good Luck and I hope  Santa is good to you.

I could not believe my ears last night, when a cross dresser told me he had been told he was not allowed to come to a munch crossed dressed as it was too much of a fetish for a vanilla setting.

I don’t believe cross dressing is a fetish to start with, it’s part of who the person is.  Second of all, I wounder if this person has seen some of these awesome people in their girl mods.  Gawd they look better then some women I know.

Of course you know this means I will be bringing my girl out to a few munches now and see the reactions of fellow kinksters as well as the establishment we attend munches.  I take pride in taking my girl every where and she is so happy that she fits in.  To her it is very important to blend in.

I can understand if dressing up as a girl is a force feminition  or coming out as a sissy girl to a munch, but cross dressers are in their own category.

So open your doors and your hearts and welcome them to the munches.